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Leaving A Toxic Relationship

For the most part, we know when a relationship is good or bad for us. We know when we need to let go, even when it's difficult to do so. We know whether or not the relationship brings out the best or the worst in us. We pay attention to how we feel in this relationship.

And at some point, if the relationship is not good for us, we decide to let it go. And afterwards, there are moments when we think about the relationship, maybe we still wonder if we could’ve made it work. Maybe we think about the good times. Maybe we even question our decision.


But we still know that it was best to let go, so we move on with our lives. And months or even years down the road, we find ourselves reminiscing on that past relationship and feel less attached. We think less and less about the whether we could’ve made it work. We think less and less about the good times. We no longer doubt our decision.


In fact, we feel so completely different from who we once were, when in that relationship, that we feel like two different people. That’s the moment we realize that the relationship was always temporary. We realize that who we are was never truly defined by that relationship, even when at that moment, that was all we knew and believed to be true about ourselves.


We changed because we had enough of the relationship. We wanted more. We wanted better for ourselves. So, we continued to grow and understand ourselves, and we allowed a new way of being to emerge. We allowed room for new thoughts, beliefs, actions, and creations. And with each new ascension, we become a new person.


In hindsight, we are a completely different person from when we first entered that relationship. And it all happened because we were willing to let go of a relationship that no longer served us.

Now, before you finish reading this blog, replace the word “relationship” with “mindset” and reread.


Are the mindsets we hold serving us in the best possible way? Is it helping or hurting us? Is it propelling us forward or holding us back?


The relationship POV feels tangible, like we can control it. It is apart from us. We say things like, “how dare they make me feel like this, I don’t deserve this, I want better.”


The mindset POV feels less tangible, especially since it all happens internally; therefore, we feel that is just who we are. It becomes a normal part of who we think we are, and we don’t stop to question whether or not it is working for or against us.


And even if we know that it's working against us, we feel like it's impossible to change it. However, at one point, we thought it was impossible to leave a bad relationship, right?


Changing our mindset is not easy, it takes commitment and daily work. Chances are it took us a while to actually decide to leave our relationship, just like it will take awhile for new thoughts, beliefs, and actions to take shape.


What if we looked at our mindset in the same manner? To see it apart from ourselves, “how dare it make me feel like this, I don’t deserve this, I want better.”

We are not our thoughts, just like we are not defined by our past relationships. Thoughts come and go. Relationships come and go.


Here’s the thing: We can control our mindset. We can change it. It is not just who we are. But, we have to decide that we want better, that we deserve better.


Our mindset is the filter through which we see the world. When we change the filter, we change how we see the world. And this changes EVERYTHING.


Sending my Love and Light.


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